You’ve heard the statement before. Or seen the meme.
“It’s ok to not be ok.” The sentiment is shared in the context of anxiety, stress, and mental health. It took rage amidst the pandemic lockdown when everyone’s day-to-day went to shit, or worse.
It’s a thoughtful take. It’s ok to not be ok. It’s meant to make you feel ok when things aren’t right. It’s meant to take the pressure off feeling 100 percent. It’s a realistic view on the weird and wild times in which we find ourselves. I get that and I agree and I’m on board — to an extent.
When I think about the it’s ok to not be ok sentiment, it feels a little bit like surrender. It’s as if you’re putting your hands up and simply dealing with the shitty circumstance you’ve found yourself in.
I’m a firm believer that with every situation — good and bad — there are ways to enhance, optimize, and grow. By virtue of you reading this, I can only assume you’d agree. And, that’s why I’m focusing on content for all of us great Growth-Driven Dads.
Look, I am absolutely not my best self right now. Let’s get that right on the table and into the great wide open.
This pandemic — and all its impacts — has fucked with me. The adjustment period, itself, has changed how I see the world. It’s changed my family’s every day. It’s been a total upside down for us. And, that’s not even to mention the added stress and anxiety a real, live global pandemic can bring for someone who is known to have internal (and sometimes, external) meltdowns when taking his daughters to a public restroom when there’s not an ongoing global health crisis.
Of course, on the grand scheme of things, we’re fortunate. My wife and I both have our jobs. Our family has remained healthy throughout and we’re relishing the time together. But, that doesn’t take away what we’re experiencing; the good, the bad, and the ugly.
The thing is, I’m not sure I was right-sized heading into this whole thing. Even prior to the pandemic, I felt constantly stressed at work and at home, behind the eight-ball on my goals, out of shape, and short-tempered. The effects of those feelings weren’t unfelt on the ones I love.
So, add on the big ol’ adjustment period and the stressors that come with “the Rona,” and you’ve got what amounts to a shitstorm of stress, anxiety, and misery over here. I can only assume you’re feeling a similar way.
So, what to do about it…
This is where my agreement with the idea that it’s ok to not be ok stops. It’s 100 percent normal to feel like things are a bit out of control. It’s normal to feel stress. It’s normal to have anxiety. It’s normal to just be a bit out of whack.
It’s ok to not be ok.
It’s just not ok to sit in it without a plan to pull yourself out. Now, I realize mental health and depression are completely different animals, and, if you’re experiencing those beasts, I implore you to get professional help and remind you it’s absolutely ok to not be ok.
However, if you’re simply stressed out, out-of-whack, or just not at your very best: welcome. It’s good to have you here.
My goal is to make Growth-Driven Dad a place where we can put all our chips on the table and figure out where to go next. Think of it as your (and my) very own weekly recalibration and accountability partner.
We’re all trying to grow and evolve into whichever version of ourselves we believe we need to be for the ones that we love. Growth-Driven Dad aims to open your eyes, share ideas, and challenge you as you begin and continue your journey towards growth.
It’s ok to not be ok, but it’s not ok doing nothing about it if you have the ability to. I applaud you for doing something about it — this week, next week, and beyond.
